New Rule Number One.

For the longest time women have compared themselves to other women. Whether it’s wishing you had someone else’s body,  lasagna recipe, tolerance for alcohol, or even wanting someone else’s boyfriend.  We’re all guilty of it. We see other women as other competitors, not as team members we’re competing with. Perfect example: Your best friend sees your ex out with another girl, obviously she tells you about this. What’s one of the first things you ask? There’s a good chance it’s something along the lines of “Am I prettier than her?” Why does any of this matter to us? Because we’re women. We can’t deny the fact that we get jealous, sometimes a little too jealous. (You know what I mean, crazy Lady) Jealousy often times leads to hate.

The good thing is you have me, The Modern Lady, to help you with this. Since we now can recognize that most of our competition feeling comes from jealousy, how do we deal with it? For one, stop comparing yourself. We were all born to be different. Life would be so boring if we were all the same. Realize that everyone is beautiful. Every hair color, eye color, height, weight, sausage or pepperoni, domestic or craft, sativa or indica… wait I think I’m getting off track. The point is, life is full of varieties! Humans are one of the most fun varieties. Second, when you’re getting that “jealous feeling” STOP IT. As soon as you feel like word vomit is going to come up, take a deep breath. A Modern Lady doesn’t allow jealousy to take control of her tongue. Remember, small minded people discuss other people. A Modern Lady is not small minded.

Why do you think mens lives are so easy? They don’t waste time hating each other, and if they do hate someone it’s for a damn good reason. Not for the petty reasons women hate each other. If two men find out they had sex with the same girl, they high five and it’s cool. If two girls have sex with the same guy, they’re fighting. Men raise their peers up, a man will more often than not help another man out whether he knows him or not. It seems like women are only superficially nice when they’re drunk in the bathroom. Start empowering each other ladies, start complimenting each other and meaning it, we’re on the same team!

Next time you catch yourself comparing yourself to someone else, stop yourself. Instead of wishing you had another woman’s wardrobe, think of three awesome pieces you have in your wardrobe. If you find yourself about to start hating on another woman, first get over yourself, then remember who you are. You’re a Lady. She’s a Lady. We’re in this together.

The Modern Lady’s New Rule Number One: Other women are not your competition, quit acting like they are.

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xxx The Modern Lady.


About The Modern Lady's Guide

We've all heard them before, our mothers taught us, our aunts warned us, and our grandmothers led the way. The Modern Lady's Guide is bringing the old rules up-to-date. Because let's face it, if we can update our phones, hair-styles, and wardrobes, we better be able to update our rule book. So go grab a beer, and get to reading.
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4 Responses to New Rule Number One.

  1. Amber T. says:

    This is good advice, but we also need to remember that as women we face pressure from everyone else to participate in this judgmental behavior. So in addition to trying to stop yourself, try to recognize when other people are trying to get you to make these toxic comparisons, and address that issue as well. We can only face an issue this big if we do it together!

    Liked by 1 person

    • You are so right! I’m glad you mentioned that, I love your input. Gossip is defintley toxic and we need to not only address the situation when it comes up but we also have to put a stop to it when it happens. Like you said, we can only do this together as women!

      Liked by 1 person

  2. Arielle says:

    I totally agree with you! We constantly compare ourselves with others (friends, peers, colleagues, models, actresses and so on) and it is driving everyone crazy. I think we all need to take a step back, stop letting the media control our minds and just live the way we want and accept everyone! I think it is normal to envy or to be a bit jealous but not to over-react or overthink. I really love your blog by the way, your posts are all amazing! I just followed you, it would be great if we can support each other 🙂 I am so glad I got to discover you ❤

    Liked by 1 person

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